Mindfulness Counselling in Stoke on Trent

Mindfulness Counselling in Stoke on Trent, Staffordshire.

First of all … Mindfulness can assist us in dealing with the ‘Multiple’ demands on our time, that we experience in this modern western world. It can feel like a juggling act to do it all, fit it all in, and be it all. We can get the feeling that we are under relentless pressure, and that ‘feeling’ and the ‘thoughts’ behind those ‘feelings’ can often lead us to believe that we’re not coping very well.

Simple Mindfulness practices or exercises can help ‘busy’ people from all walks of life to feel happier, less stressed and more content and in control of their thoughts and emotions.

Mindfulness Counselling in Stoke on Trent, Staffordshire.

Given your already lengthy to-do list, you’re probably thinking, how on earth can mindfulness make me calmer …  and what is mindfulness exactly anyway?

It is perhaps easiest to think of mindfulness simply as an ability to be quiet, calm and still. In a place where you can view your ‘Inner environment’ and your ‘Outer environment’ at the same time. A place of calm observation, whilst also being able to be the observed at the same time.

Hence; When you become conscious enough to become the ‘Observer’ you are no longer at the mercy of your thoughts, or the outer world, or the outer environment. You can learn how to look ‘at’ your thoughts with ‘acceptance’ and non-judgement, rather than being controlled by them.

The Results of this Mindfulness Practice.

Consequently;  You can ‘learn’ to be still and calm inside your mind and body. You can learn to ‘respond’ to life approprately, rather than ‘reacting’ to ever changing life situations, Life is constantly changing around you, and if you are able to surf this ever shifting carpet, rather than feeling like the rug has been pulled from beneath you everytime.  This is the key to finding a true sense of peace, calm and happiness.

Furthermore; The good news is that you can be mindful at any time, and in any place. It is only a mindful breath away. The best way to get a sense of what mindfulness actually is, Is through experiencing it directly ‘Yourself’

A Short Mindfulness Exercise for you …. 

Here is a short exercise that will give you a taste of mindfulness right now.

Sit comfortably in a chair or lie down, close your eyes and take a few breaths. ‘Notice’ the breath, notice the brief pause at the end of the in breath, notice the brief pause at the end of the out breath. Also notice the temperature of the breath, notice how it’s ever so slightly warmer as you breathe out.

The emphasis is on the ‘Noticing’ … Being fully ‘Present’ as you carry out this exercise. 

    Mindfulness Image             

More Mindfulness Practices.

With consistent Practice; You will become increasingly aware of the physical sensations that you are directly experiencing in this moment. … (Right Now!)

Maybe you feel tension or pressure from the sheer volume of thoughts that you’re experiencing, and how you ‘Instinctively’ or ‘Habitually’ react to them. Maybe you feel an urge to try to prevent these thoughts from manifesting ?

Instead just try to simply ‘Notice’ the thoughts, rather than judging them or wishing they would go away. (Don’t Resist!)

What we Resist ….. Persists!

In Mindfulness Practice You will Learn how to acquire;  A Greater Awareness of your Thoughts and Feelings.

Also; … Becoming more aware of your environment too …

The sounds and smells around you. Learn how to “Tune” into this moment called (NOW)  

See if you can let the sounds come and go without ‘Reacting’ in anyway. Allowing the thoughts and sounds to just ebb and flow, whilst being fully aware of them.

In Conclusion …

As a result of you acquiring Mindfulness Skills …  Not only will your ‘Mind’ benefit from the experience.  Your ‘Body’ will benefit too.

Most of all if you need guidance with ‘Learning Mindfulness Skills’

Whether or not, to help you to get through your difficulties …. Or just simply to become happier in your life. Whatever the reason, call today!

Its Easier than you might think!

Contact me 

Or Maybe take a look at my BACP website 

Warmest Regards and many thanks for reading.

Steve Haines Counselling Services in Stoke on Trent, Staffordshire.

Life Coaching and CBT Counselling in Stoke on Trent

Life Coaching in Stoke on Trent

LIFE COACHING in Stoke on Trent.

First of all;  What is Life Coaching?

 

Life Coaching stoke on trent

Personal Life Coaching is an interaction or a conversation between one person and another.  (The Coach) and the recipient or (Coachee). The relationship is primarily, one of a ‘helping’ nature. One of a motivational kind.  One which may focus on, business, music, relationships, personal development? In fact, on ‘any area’ of which the recipient would like help or inspiration with?

Joining up the pieces in Life Coaching.

Basically in Life Coaching, the coach possesses knowledge of how to help the other find their ‘own’ answers to their own dilemmas. Most of all, through inspiration, encouragement and understanding. If the coach truly hears the coachees difficulties and then helps determine why the person feels that they cannot succeed in whatever area of their life they need help with. The aim being, focusing on ‘them’ and helping them attain ‘their’ goals, whatever that goal means for them?

Creating Change?

The coachee may be wishing to change an aspect of their life that they are unhappy with. They may wish to change this area of their life but not know how? Or they may just not know how to get started? The coachee might just wish to get ‘better’ at what they already do well?

Where Does Life Coaching come from?

Although life coaching is fastly becoming recognised as being useful in the world of business and personal development. Most people might reference the world of sport if they were asked what life coaching actually was?
Athletes, Footballers and the like have been using coaches for the purpose of Life Coaching for decades to great advantage. The skills of the coach do not have to be equal to that of the coachee.
The coach possesses an entirely different set of skills, related to observation and subsequent ‘feedback’ based on observing the coachees strengths and weaknesses.

Skill Sets required.

A world class footballer does not need a world class footballer to teach them ‘their’ style of play. A coach focuses on helping the coachee to recognise how they may improve their own game, their own energy, their own motivation and working closely alongside them to help them to draw upon their own unique inner resources.

The word ‘coach’ is derived from a French word ‘coche’ originating in Hungary and defined by the purpose being to ‘teach’ or ‘instruct’ ‘motivate’ or ‘inspire’
Also a ‘coach’ … a railway coach, or a bus, are all vehicles used to transport people from one place to another, ultimately helping a person get from point A to point B.
The ‘coach’ is the ‘vehicle’ used for this purpose of transformation or transportation.

What is executive coaching?

How can an executive benefit from a life coaching experience?

Maybe they can acquire skills to enable them to lead by ‘example.’  Which may then; ‘Influence’ the rest of their entire workforce to follow their own example.
In other words by helping the people at the ‘top’ …

We ‘influence’ everyone else in the company to do well at their own individual job. Consequently; the whole company benefits and as a result they may improve their overall standards of workmanship, right across the board in that company.

Coaches can be individually and uniquely trained to operate internally within the company, so that the coach has a greater understanding of that particular business. The drawback to this form of ‘Internal Operational Style of Coaching’ is the ‘power dynamics’ Chief executives

‘external’ coaches are often used to apply their skills within a company for a fixed time period until the work has been carried out successfully.

Coaching can also aid junior executives to make leaps up into more senior positions in the company and they can benefit by becoming more able to apply themselves and to then thrive in their new exciting roles rather than being fearful of the added responsibilities that the new role may first bring.

Why do people choose life coaching?

I think it’s fair to say that the most people, rightly or wrongly wish to achieve some level of ‘success’ at what they do, whether that’s, a sport, a career or a need to make some very important life decisions, to do with their health, relationship, or their life in general.
Some of us come from a place of; “I can and I will” and others from a place of
“I don’t think I can.” That’s what Life Coaching can help you with!

Coaching can help both sets of people to define, just, exactly what’s holding them back from making decisions and to inspire them to take action, prioritising their highest potential, and better still – how to focus on what they ‘do want’ rather than what they don’t want and they may benefit from collaborative direction or suggestion, a new set of trained eyes to help them see from an unclouded lense, this can be useful to most people, so that they may form some sort of clearer evaluation for themselves.
Coaching is predominantly ‘solution-focused’ and ‘motivational’ which helps us to improve or enhance our general performance in whatever areas we are seeking help with.

Counselling or Coaching?

Conversely; Counselling is more problem-focused, focusing on trauma, or mental health difficulties. Both having their own merits and both achieve their own desirable results. If it’s solutions or motivation the person wants help with then they might choose life coaching. If it’s problems they’re seeking help with, they may choose counselling?

When is Life Coaching not the answer?

As mentioned briefly, and touched upon in my answer above. There is a time for focusing on solutions and motivation and a time for focusing on problems.  A need to get to the bottom of more serious problems – such as mental health issues. Maybe phobias, addictions, personality disorders, or perhaps, post traumatic stress disorder could be apparent. Maybe as a result of an accident or life trauma situation, to name just a few.

These conditions must be dealt with by a trained health professional, specialising in that particular area, appropriate to that specific condition.
Although coaches act from their own experience and from their own acquired intuition they must be mindful of when to refer a client to a more suitable service.
Referral is important in every service including, being a Life Coach.

I myself am a counsellor and Coach, but i’m acutely aware of my own limitations and there are times when i need to refer to someone more experienced in ’A’ particular area.
The order of the day is “If in doubt seek guidance”

What is Collaborative Life Coaching?

Collaborative means … To ‘collaborate’ with someone else. In other words, make
A ‘joint decision’ Which is made with an awareness of the others autonomy.
We cannot tell a person or coachee (what to do!)

Respect and humility play a huge part in making a ‘collaborative’ decision when formulating a strategic plan of action. The coachee must wish to participate in the plan, if he or she doesn’t – there will be no action or movement and also a lack of trust and respect for the coach could happen, trust is created by being honest and acting with integrity. Also most people do not generally respond well to being told what to do!

Outcome of Life Coaching 

In Life Coaching a coach uses his own expertise in ‘enabling’ the coachee to embark on a mutually agreed, guided discovery. Rather than them finding themselves in unknown territory.

Honesty and openness between coach and coachee is imperative for the coachee to approve of the work and to embrace the challenge. Because they ‘want to’ rather than being told they ‘Have To!’ …

What is the difference between directive and nondirective conversation in Life Coaching?

Directive or Non-Directive?

Directive conversation is a conversation which is primarily focused on instructing a person on ‘what to do’ with their lives by suggesting or advising, which of course is your ‘own’ view of ‘what is right for them’ as you see it. Even when a coachee comes along, specifically asking for advice, they rarely respond well to being told ‘what to do’ and ultimately they will do what they want to do anyway, with or without your approval.

As a result; … This is the fundamental challenge in Life Coaching. Understanding how a person’s autonomy works in reality. Understanding this principle, helps us to understand the true meaning of collaboration. A successful Life Coach embodies this deeper understanding so that we can respect the other’s views, with an awareness that the coachee is already managing their own life without you onboard as a helper. We are in the privileged position of being asked for help by another … the coachee.

They have put their trust in us to act in a way that’s best for them, and not what suits us to suggest is right for them.

In Conclusion; …

Non-directive conversation is about being aware of just .. ‘Offering’ suggestions. Almost as a ‘last resort’ … And only if the coachee cannot find their own answer to their own dilemmas. Rather than coaching in a directive way. Otherwise you are likely to find the solution for them. Rather than the coachee being able to find their own solution. Furthermore; It is through non directive conversation, that the coachee discovers how to discover their own ‘Inner Coach’ so that they may pull their own ideas from within. This is also vital from a future maintenance point of view.  And Finally; they must be guided towards their own discoveries.

This is just a little bit about Life Coaching from me to you

Steve Haines Counselling and Life Coaching in Stoke on Trent

Many Thanks for reading.

Contact Me 

Maybe Visit My BACP WebPage

Or my other Website

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Warmest Regards

Steve Haines Counsellor CBT Therapist and coach in Stoke on Trent